A very nice young telemarketer from AT&T called me yesterday. Most of the time I gauge my phone nastiness factor on how idiotic the caller behaves. I vary between just hanging up, to stringing them along, to acting insane, or sometimes I just leave the phone off the hook and see how long it takes for them to hang up.
This guy was trying to sell me DSL. I have DSL, but not through AT&T. Here’s how the conversation went:
Him: Hello sir, I’m sorry to interrupt your evening (and he sounded genuine!), but I wanted to call to inform you that AT&T is finally offering DSL in your area.
Me: That’s actually interesting.
Him: Thank you sir, do you currently have Cable Modem, or are you using Dialup?
Me: Actually, there’s not Cable Internet service available here, and I’m using DSL, but though a local provider.
Him: [pause as he follows a flowchart I’m sure] I see, sir, are you aware that AT&T offers DSL service for only $19.95 a month?
Me: How could I be aware of that? You told me yourself AT&T just started offering service. I realize you weren’t trying to be condescending, so tell me the details. What speeds do you offer?
Him: We offer 1.5 megabit service
Me: That’s downstream, but what upload speeds do you have?
Him: Um, we offer uploads speeds between 128 and 384 bits. (I’m sure he meant kilobits, but I didn’t bother correcting him)
Me: I currently have 1 megabit symmetric DSL, so that my VPN to work is a more manageable speed. Do you offer anything greater than 384 kilobit, or is that the best service you can offer? If so, what’s the cost?
[ridiculously long pause, really absurd]
Him: I’m sorry for the delay sir. Did you know that AT&T offers wireless modems?
[slight pause on my end]
Me: Young man, let me save you some time. I’m not the client you’re looking for. Thank you for your time, but I’ll let you go for tonight, OK?
Him: Thank you sir, you have a great night. Sorry for interrupting your evening.